{"id":10518,"date":"2021-12-28T05:49:28","date_gmt":"2021-12-28T05:49:28","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/trulymadly.com\/blog\/?p=10518"},"modified":"2022-01-10T12:26:24","modified_gmt":"2022-01-10T12:26:24","slug":"frequently-asked-questions","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/trulymadly.com\/blog\/frequently-asked-questions\/","title":{"rendered":"Frequently Asked Questions"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

1. What Is the Right Way of Using Condoms?<\/h3>\n

So here is a quick guide on what to and what to not do.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Don\u2019t you think you ought to have read up on all this earlier? Not just outside your partner\u2019s home, in the lift or parking lot!\u00a0 So quick check, if you are going to be doing it, please, there is nothing called Dubs and Trips in the condom lexicon.\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n

Double or triple will not enhance the protection, it will cause friction and bust the condom and it will surely half the fun, if that \u2013 condom hai not bubble wrap<\/em>.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Then, NO fishing it out from your sock \u2013neither is that a safe, nor is it sexy at all. A mood buster, FoSho!\u00a0 Condoms do not belong in socks, feet do and condoms are not for feet! They need to be kept in a cool comfy non sweaty zone \u2013 so, please!!\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

And for the record \u2013 it\u2019s a condom \u2013 not a time bomb. Check expiry, check manufacture, latex, check<\/span> lubricated. And then check yourself out too mate, hopefully, you\u2019ve had a bath and brushed your teeth and nothing smells bad and all <\/span>discharges have<\/span> been attended to, before you ring that bell\u2026otherwise ji, the only bell you will be ringing, is an Icon.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

2. Are condoms the best way to avoid STIs? Yes!<\/h3>\n

Not new news \u2013 the surest way of not getting one- don\u2019t have sex. Ever! Now that\u2019s safe \u2013 and I guess for many, Dull as a dreary day. <\/span><\/p>\n

So getting sexual is pretty much like jumping into an Infinity pool \u2013 you are going to get drenched \u2013 but you needn\u2019t get sucked into an STI typhoon \u2013 do you?. <\/span><\/p>\n

There are precautions you know. The top of the charts, The ever-faithful \u2013 NO \u2013 Not the partner \u2013 The condom. Dip it only once you slip it \u2013 ON. <\/span><\/p>\n

The condom I mean. Now don\u2019t be so na\u00efve when the partner says \u2013 \u201cI have been saving it up for you\u2026 <\/span>let’s<\/span> not cover up\u201d !! RED FLAG WARNING!! <\/span><\/p>\n

Due Diligence needed Bro! The problem is \u2013 when we love, the trust button kinda gets activated on its own and that\u2019s how it ought to be. <\/span><\/p>\n

Nonetheless, Condoms and safety from <\/span>STIs needn\u2019t become a mistrust issue with either of you \u2013 it\u2019s a safety issue \u2013 for both of you. <\/span><\/p>\n

Finally, the good word in any relationship, \u201ctake off\u201d<\/span>. Get a test \u2013 both of you \u2013 and everyone is good to go. Boom Boom, Shake the Room, again! <\/span><\/p>\n

3. Is ‘erection spray’ the right solution for staying longer during sex?<\/h3>\n

Dahling! What better turn on than talking sex, talking naughty, dirty, lovey-dovey, about the body, and parts about spills and spark \u2013 basically Talking. However, it seems someone has spread a rumor! <\/span><\/p>\n

That spray\u2019s help! Eh, Yaa, maybe the body spray fragrance, sexy perfume Eau<\/span> cologne type \u2013 ( users warning on this one too)\u00a0 not the spray-on penis kind \u2013 hell you don\u2019t need spray to keep it propped up. <\/span><\/p>\n

So the issue is not about the spray, but rather you feel you need to use one as a, You know \u2013 keep the building from the falling situation. So here\u2019s the dope. They are Dope. The spray is no solution nor \u201ccure\u201d<\/span>. It’s<\/span>\u00a0a cool anesthetic type of action \u2013 it freezes the area \u2013 you stay up longer, but <\/span>it also <\/span>dulls the sensation. <\/span><\/p>\n

Now you tell me. What would you rather \u2013 a shorter period of real raunchy skin-on-skin action or a longer phase of on and on and no but no real feel to it? <\/span><\/p>\n

Let your body do what it has, address the weak erection matter \u2013 and don\u2019t reach for that \u201cassured\u201d can of performance enhancement spray \u2013 nothing enhances an act of love and sex as much as being Up Front about it!! <\/span><\/p>\n

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4. Are porn movies worth taking inspiration from?<\/h3>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

There are two categories in this world \u2026 porn lovers and porn diss\u2019ers! And by and large, never te Twain shall meet. Lovers \u2013 lap it up, suck it in, sponge it all \u2013 they love it more than anything – like it\u2019s a lifeline, life without <\/span>it is is<\/span> Ekdum Akejo<\/span><\/i> (for you nonliterary, in the words of Thakur Tagore, that\u2019s useless.).<\/span><\/p>\n

The Diss\u2019ers \u2013 are utterly, well, disrespectful \u2013 hate it, ugly, sick, repulsive and plainly <\/span>Joghonno <\/span><\/i>\u2013 (also in the words of Thakur Tagore, meaning awful)\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

So that\u2019s that.\u00a0 Nature <\/span>forbids<\/span> the two come together \u2013 a miss match made on Earth if there is one.<\/span><\/p>\n

So the truth is.\u00a0 Love it \u2013 don\u2019t expect to live it.<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/span>It’s a tough<\/span> act to follow. And you don\u2019t live a life of cut and copy and paste and neither does your act of sex come together on an Edit table top! Got it? It’s reel \u2013 not real.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

So the next time you even think of demanding what you see in porn from your partner \u2013 consider what you yourself are bringing to the table \u2013 To the table, not ON the table. <\/span>Bujhhlam?<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

Now the Dis\u2019ser lot. Feel free to trash it.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

However do lend ear to the fact that it\u2019s not for you to replicate \u2013 but just for some harmless fun, some sexy\u2019fying, some excitement, and while it\u2019s not exactly \u201c Rules of sex – Final Fact Version\u201d\u00a0 \u2013 but rather it\u2019s just for shedding some inhibitions, spicing it up a bit. Still don\u2019t like it \u2013 cool.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Bottom line \u2013 can\u2019t force it on anyone, can\u2019t expect to replicate it, and mainly, can\u2019t at all vilify nor victimize anyone who uses it, loves it, hates it, or even stars in it. Entirely a matter of <\/span>Pachondo<\/span><\/i> \u2013 do I have to say it again?<\/span><\/p>\n

5. Men and Women Masturbation! To do or not to do?<\/h3>\n

Oh God, Final verdict \u2013 does not cause anyone any harm to anyone, will not make the world collapse, and will not make the dong fall off!! That\u2019s it done. <\/span><\/p>\n

End of Chapter. Myths abound, galore. Folks who worked on sexuality helplines in the early \u201990s were answering questions<\/span> about the possible \u201charms of masturbation\u201d and online services today \u2013 are doing the same.\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n

Till date. 30 years down the line. The guy who began masturbating in the mid-\u201990s at say, age 15 is 45 or more today\u2026 but No. If there is a legacy he is going to hand over to his generations it is, \u201cMasturbation Kills\u201d \u2013 and he is a living example of the same!!\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Did you see how we are talking about only Him – of Men and the Male, in this conversation on Masturbation?\u00a0 Well, that\u2019s mere because what do women know about the M-word? What do they have to <\/span>do with M<\/span>? Right?<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00a0WRONG. Another major \u201cm\u201d (here, Myth) is that women don\u2019t know how to, never want to, don\u2019t <\/span>know <\/span>how it feels, don\u2019t have the desire\u2026 all nonsense. <\/span><\/p>\n

Female Masturbation has almost just come out of the closet \u2013 any just like anything, just out of the closet \u2013 is still viewed with a certain doubt and disbelief. <\/span><\/p>\n

Trash that now!! And here\u2019s a fun fact \u2013 There is a World Masturbation Day \u2013 May 7<\/span>th<\/span>!! Mark it \u2013 on your phone and May this day bring you Joy and Happiness \u2013 alone and with your spesh one!!\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

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6. Is home remedy the ideal solution in every case?<\/h3>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Not unless it\u2019s for a basic plain case of gas or constipation. And that\u2019s where it ends.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

For God’s sake!<\/strong><\/em> There must be millions of stuff on why self-diagnosing and self-medication is not a good idea. We come from a country of home remedies \u2013 from applying ghee to a burning vagina to dipping a\u00a0 penis in ice water \u2013 for results only the heavens can anticipate!! <\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHell\u201d No to both and many more such. Please see a doctor and dump that Jhola Chaap. Your body is your address \u2013 keep it ready for visitors, not nosy nobody. <\/span><\/p>\n

The problem at hand can be more serious than just an attack of gas which by the way could be a Heart attack in disguise \u2013 and delaying or postponing attention is actually worsening the problem, not improving it. <\/span><\/p>\n

We spend so much on our daily bakwaas \u2013 a once in a while trip to a specialist \u2013 is very worth it in comparison \u2013 wouldn\u2019t you say? It’s like saying to yourself \u2013 I love myself enough to invest in a physician and intervention \u2013 because I am worth it!<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n

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7. Why you must stop self diagnosis TODAY?<\/span><\/h3>\n

No!! No!! <\/b>No, you don\u2019t have STD or Corona or HIV \u2013 because you have not got a \u201ctest\u201d, have you?\u00a0 No \u2013 the symptoms you are reading on the net for this awful tummy ache is not a ruptured ulcer – so don\u2019t jump to conclusions. Yes, today you are bluesy \u2013 no you are not Bi-Polar or any other such. <\/span><\/p>\n

But self-diagnosis can make you really Nuts. So quit it. You have a set of symptoms \u2013 see a doctor. You are the expert on what your body, head, and heart feel like \u2013 Tune in \u2013 Listen. And if something feels not alright \u2013 go seek counsel.\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n

Do you know so many people have lost all their land life savings to just thinking and overthinking, \u201csomething is wrong with me.\u201d\u201d. <\/span><\/p>\n

They go to such lengths to prove it to themselves without any help or correct guidance. Test upon test, such unrest. <\/span><\/p>\n

To see a doctor \u2013 get assured and relax. Remember Search Engines are not doctors \u2013 they are merely means to find them. <\/span><\/p>\n

8. What’s the right and the best way of dealing with hurtful rejections?<\/h3>\n
Oh Horrible. Apparently the feeling of being rejected \u2013 is considered to be as painful as a boxing bout!! So says \u2013 I guess someone who has felt it \u2013 not essentially in a boxing ring. So that makes all of us \u2013 at some time or the other.\u00a0 <\/span><\/div>\n
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Some may have got knocked out in the first round, some got bashed about till the last one. <\/span>It <\/span>still hurts does. Now! What do you see a beaten boxer do \u2013 bleed, fall, stagger, fall again, lay flat, all of that and?? <\/span><\/div>\n
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And GET UP. Get Up on your feet and get ready \u2013 try again and again and finally, the bout ends in a loss,\u00a0 they also raise their arm \u2013 in a, I agree somewhat dejected stance \u2013 however indicating to the world and the \u2018opponent\u2019 \u2013 I gave it my best shot. <\/span><\/div>\n
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I have learned a lot from this episode, I am going now and <\/span>I’ll<\/span> be back \u2013 ready and strong.\u00a0 And that’s<\/span>\u00a0exactly how \u201c<\/span>rejection” needs rejection \u2018 needs<\/span> to be handled <\/span>I say.\u00a0 <\/span><\/div>\n
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So you gave the relationship your best \u2013 and it came with a shelf life over.\u00a0 Hurt, weep, cry, OD on carbs… for a while… and then be, The Beautiful Boxer \u2013 graceful, stronger, and back in the ring. Yes? <\/span><\/div>\n

9. Is getting a BIKINI WAX the right thing to do?<\/h3>\n

Now this discussion can go from Not to 60 in half a second. The <\/span>jury’s out <\/span>on this one, still. Verdict Pending.\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n

Technical folks say \u2013 the hair is a cushion and a barrier to the land of down under.\u00a0 So whatever can come between 2 fingers keep \u2013 the rest snip away. <\/span><\/p>\n

But now. There are salons \u2013 you can get a coiffeur or you can get as clean as a whistle. All parts from the hirsute to the downy \u2013 can undergo \u2013 well wax, creams, razors, and even Laser. On the other hand, we have the arduous grazer- who is quite protective about his <\/span>brood’s<\/span>\u00a0bush \u2013 and maybe their own as well. <\/span><\/p>\n

All in all \u2013 Up to you and ya \u2013 the partner. The eternal conundrum will exist between the Razor and Grazer. <\/span><\/p>\n

Whatever be the final choice \u2013 keep yourself very clean, very safe when you are using any kind of devices or products \u2013 not exactly the Prairies nor Pampas \u2013 that\u2019s very tricky terrain down there and all those parts – jewels of the Crown.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

10. Healthy is sexy! The new mantra we all must follow.<\/h3>\n

Too tight tops and too bright lipsticks, a size smaller jeans, and a bigger size jock \u2013 umm umm \u2013 not cutting the mustard anymore.\u00a0 Not sexy and definitely not an advertorial <\/span>for Healthy<\/span> either. <\/span><\/p>\n

Keeping yourself fit, committed to some self-time, some efforts at being safe, not taking your health and body for granted – now that shows a commitment \u2013 to self, and hopefully, we assume will spin to the other as well.\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n

I bumped into a young woman the other day \u2013 ok \u2013 bit XL but running it, in short shorts \u2013 I tell you Owing her body. <\/span>Impressive.\u00a0 Until… she finished off her\u00a0 introduction with, \u201cI don\u2019t care about this corona shorona.\u201dUmm Umm. Done and dusted. <\/span><\/p>\n

Days of being Cavalier about health \u2013 so gone. So watch what goes into your mouth \u2013 make sure <\/span>it’s <\/span>clean and good <\/span>for you<\/span> and then find ways to balance your mind and body, share it with the other, show some love to your own health and others and see how that becomes really quite sexy too.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

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12. Is female virginity that a bigger deal?<\/h3>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

Alias, Lost, Chole Geche, Gone Girl … Shut Up. <\/span>It’s<\/span> a teeny tissue, <\/span>it’s<\/span>\u00a0broken<\/span>. <\/span>It’s not<\/span> a character certificate you need to show every person you meet. I am <\/span>an honest<\/span> human being, but…I\u2019ve lost something \u2013 MY JEWEL!<\/span><\/p>\n

Damaged Goods that is me now.\u201d\u201d Utter Rubbish! Stop it.\u00a0 Stop handing over this all-encompassing power to the other.\u00a0 \u2013 Beginning any relationship with an apology for having had sex before, or having lost the Gem. <\/span><\/p>\n

If your partner can\u2019t see you for who you are, for what you bring to the relationship and all your goodness is trash in comparison to a sexual history \u2013 then it\u2019s time \u2013 for them to be \u2013 history. Cut it out. Begin with yourself, Please.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

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12. Are you faking it to satisfy your man’s ego? Stop right there!<\/h3>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

\u201cAllow me to elsewhereelse where write on ways you can do it and why you ought not to \u2013 in an Orgasmna\u2026<\/em>\u201d Enough to be said on those matters. <\/span>Let’s<\/span>\u00a0sum it with a YES. Yes women do it \u2013 a Lot. <\/span><\/p>\n

And No you need not. If you <\/span>need<\/span>\u00a0to<\/span> fake it \u2013 means something not kosher in that chemistry \u2013 Today or ever?\u00a0 It is as if women have been tutored \u2013 \u201cyou too must finish\u201d so that he feels more powerful? <\/span><\/p>\n

\u201dAhh see \u2013 I can make any woman. Pandering to a \u201cfrailty\u201d, Ladies? And Gentlemen, stop the need questions. \u201c\u201d Did you? Big or Small.\u2026\u201d Since faking it is the <\/span>special menu special<\/span>.\u00a0 Hear me. <\/span>It’s<\/span> actually a tiny lie, fib \u2013 and that is a trust matter, no?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

You do it once and more, a disconnect forms with your partner, very tough to get back \u2013 too much pressure on both of you. <\/span><\/p>\n

So <\/span>it’s<\/span> not happening, it’s not \u2013 another time, another style, a new repertoire of foreplay perhaps? Nothing right about a Fake \u2013 however expensive it may be,\u00a0 Yes? <\/span><\/p>\n

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13. Can ORAL SEX be the cause of HIV and OS?<\/h3>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

Good news: \u2013 You LIKE and WANT Oral Sex. Thumbs Up. Bad news: \u2013 Someone has already dissed it for you, <\/span>sowing<\/span> seeds of doubt.\u00a0 Oral sex causes HIV. ( and as an aside, also cancer!! ( Hell, No) ) So hear it.\u00a0 HIV and OS, Chances \u2013 very low. Now comes the <\/span>pallbearer<\/span>. <\/span><\/p>\n

UNLESS you have a cut or sore unless you have bleeding <\/span>gums unless<\/span> you have an open wound. unless you use a dental dam, unless you know their OS History<\/span>,\u00a0 <\/b>\u2013unless you eat spicy food unless you went to a dentist. <\/span><\/p>\n

How about Unless you Bung up –\u00a0 Zip it. Nothing is going into your mouth \u2013 EVER. Ok Perhaps all these Unless have a worth, but hey \u2013 haven\u2019t you been reading? <\/span><\/p>\n

What did we say <\/span>about <\/span>Health? Do now please, kiss or come breathing distance close to anyone with open sores, cuts, wounds, bloody body parts ( ok can make a concession there).<\/span><\/p>\n

Why in the world will you offer your mouth or <\/span>genitals<\/span>\u00a0\u2013 if any such situation presents itself.\u00a0 Hell, No.\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n

And More so \u2013 if <\/span>genitals <\/span>are similar symptom bearers, \u2013 would you want them in your MOUTH?\u00a0 Use your EYES \u2013 look, see, find! \u201cAnd if need be Postpone.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

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14. How to keep your consent game on point? No guess work please!<\/h3>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

Yes <\/span>means<\/span> Yes and, No means No. \u2013 It does not mean Maybe Perhaps. Those are two separate categories. So, few facts. <\/span><\/p>\n

All parties have to give clear consent. \u2013 If <\/span>it’s<\/span> not clear, Ask!\u2026 <\/span>So do <\/span>I consider that a \u201cyes\u201d or , I am guessing that\u2019s a \u201c No \u201c, or alright, \u201clet’s wait till you\u2019re sure\u201d. <\/span><\/p>\n

Now, consent can be given at <\/span>any time<\/span>, can be taken back at any time., \u201cThose are the ways of the <\/span>Lord. You<\/span>\u00a0are <\/span>master<\/span> of your body, of your desires and choices. Anyone pushing any boundary at any time \u2013 Perp Alert!! I tell you, easier said than done. <\/span><\/p>\n

For both partners. You like the person, so you <\/span>don’t<\/span>\u00a0want <\/span>to hurt<\/span> them by being a Wuss, but you end up feeling like one for not saying what you meant \u2013 <\/span>who’s<\/span>\u00a0the Wuss now.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

You \u201c<\/span>allow the\u201d the<\/span> person to do what they are, coz you don\u2019t want to lose them , you don\u2019t know how to say No! \u201cYou suddenly become the \u201cGood Girl\u201d,\u201dLovely Boy\u201d\u2013 hark back childhood, (No Chinna, Don\u2019t say No, \u2026\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

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15. How to tackle ghosting?<\/h3>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

Yeah \u2013 that\u2019s you, Dude! Call <\/span>it out<\/span> \u2013 call the shots \u2013 you got Ghosted! So freaking what. Unless, you were out shopping for the booze for the Bachelor party and the 9-yard sari for the wedding reception, already. Then ya,\u00a0 You are the Munja here.\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n

The other side of online dating. Swipe select commit .. s the right side. The flip is, Gone out of the window \u2013 literally in this case! You <\/span>are already<\/span>\u00a0ready for your <\/span>daily<\/span>\u00a0routine \u2013 <\/span>another<\/span>\u00a0\u2018party\u2019 \u2013 does not show\u2026 2 days gone. <\/span><\/p>\n

Search Ops begin! FBI scours the surface of Social Media-\u00a0 <\/span>Instagram<\/span>, FB, e-mail, ityadi. Nopes! <\/span>Can’t<\/span>\u00a0find it\u2019s like a perfect <\/span>advert<\/span>\u00a0for vanishing cream! Ghosted Dude. <\/span>Gone<\/span>. So now what. Stalk, find out, land up at the <\/span>doorstep<\/span> of all the Kartiks in South, find where Alka is \u2013 all 5780of them? <\/span><\/p>\n

Get over it ya \u2013 let it go. Something\u2019s gotta give. If they can do this after all that you both invested then well, they were not showing their real side to you were they. There was some hiding happening and you don\u2019t want to be with a hider \u2013 let me assure you. <\/span>Secretiveness<\/span>\u00a0is never sexy, <\/span>it’s<\/span>\u00a0creepy. <\/span><\/p>\n

And hey you Ghosties, <\/span>Don’t<\/span> be creepy ya \u2013 just be upfront, Say a Cheerio before you Go-Go. I mean, <\/span>it’s<\/span> not like the other person is collapsing if you do exit!\u00a0 The bottom line is, Can Happen Will Happen, Don\u2019t get <\/span>too bothered<\/span>\u00a0about it. It\u2019s a part of the whole <\/span>online<\/span>\u00a0scene.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

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16. Let’s break the long prevailed myths around men stereotypes.<\/h3>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

And particularly for men.\u00a0 No way can a man get away with possessing or displaying any set of emotions which remotely border on the softer side. Anh Anh!!\u00a0 Showing empathy, sadness, grief, or God Forbid taking the other person\/ genders\u2019 side when a \u2018Bro\u2019 is involved \u2013 It\u2019s an SOS call.<\/span><\/p>\n

And all this apparently acts out pretty cruelly in the real world, particularly where men are trying to just Nail It \u2013 No, not the Love front ( only) the Job Front, the work arena.\u00a0 Where <\/span>manhood<\/span>\u00a0needs to be proved<\/span> and approved, almost every day, 3 times a day. <\/span><\/p>\n

And because showing any of these \u2013 is a sure shot in your own foot \u2013 Men just bury it. \u2018Vulnerable\u2019, Who me? <\/span><\/p>\n

Hell No. <\/span>I’m fine<\/span>\u2026 Just Fynnneee!! And then comes a Swipe Right- and Oh Ho \u2013 Brute force will get you beyond a \u201chello\u201d in the online space Bro! So break that code, be it at work or online dating.<\/span><\/p>\n

it’s<\/span> really \u2018normal\u2019 ( and unfortunately, not so common)\u00a0 to own up to feelings, cos\u2019 you know what, no one feels \u2018high emotions<\/span>‘ all<\/span> the time, – No, No One! So when you do \u2013 that\u2019s fine.<\/span><\/p>\n

That\u2019s cool actually \u2013 you may not have the lexicon, yet \u2013 but showing empathy, understanding, vulnerability, weakness, confusion \u2026 is all Ok ! Prepare for the time when you are able to say, \u201c am I the only feminist in the room?<\/span><\/p>\n

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17. It’s time we give our immunity and health the much needed attention!<\/h3>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n

No, not<\/span> you and your partner. Suppressed Immunity and Infections.\u00a0 Particularly some of them. So let’s say HIV \u2013 AIDS. Where the \u2018I\u2019 stands for Immunity or lack of it! So in our country and hereabouts, once your Immunity is lowered \u2013 in the case <\/span>of HIV<\/span>\u00a0\u2013 AIDS, the other one you may have to watch out for \u2013 is TB. <\/span><\/p>\n

Only <\/span>because<\/span>\u00a0it’s<\/span> so rampant in our part of the world and hereabouts.\u00a0 Both HIV and TB are not at all \u2018classist\u2019 \u2013 anyone can get it \u2013 just like that. It\u2019s a commonly seen infection in the <\/span>course of a positive <\/span>person’s<\/span> life. <\/span><\/p>\n

And so is Herpes. Not the sexual kind, the skin kind, also called, Shingles.\u00a0 So what\u2019s key to this is \u2013 a person whose Immune system is impacted \u2013 they are at a much bigger risk of picking up an infection <\/span>from<\/span>\u00a0the \u201callegedly healthy \u201cperson. <\/span><\/p>\n

So hey \u2013 whose responsibility is it now to keep <\/span>the immunity suppressed<\/span> person fit and fine. Your Gringos!! <\/span><\/p>\n

Don\u2019t bring your damn <\/span>viruses<\/span>\u00a0and <\/span>bacteria around<\/span> the room where someone is already Immune suppressed. Use basic hygiene and condoms! Keep your Dingbat Germs under Control and check\u00a0 Man!!\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

18. Call It Out<\/h3>\n

Pata <\/span>nahi<\/span> chalta. Meaning, you don\u2019t get to know. <\/span>It’s<\/span>\u00a0happening, <\/span>it’s<\/span>\u00a0ongoing, <\/span>it’s<\/span> there but you don\u2019t see it \u2013 or say you don\u2019t want to. Control and Manipulation often come cloaked and <\/span>care and <\/span>offer protection<\/span> and safety and the famous words, \u201cit’s for you own good, Baby\u201d. <\/span><\/p>\n

So now it’s up to you.\u00a0 Keep an eye for Red Flags and I tell you \u2013 there are many. Make your own list of NN \u2013 ie Nonnegotiable and stick with them. Even I f you like h other person, onehellavalot! Because the same person has the potential to hurt you, onehellavalot, in many big and small ways.\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n

It’s much easier to spot if it’s direct\u00a0 – like a physical attack, a shove a push, a slap\u2026 No doubt there. And then, it can be very covert, \u201c Shaan hates me to go out after 8 alone\u201d, even Shaan is surprised \u2013 but she surely has painted pictures of Shaan for you. <\/span><\/p>\n

And say Shaan says \u2013 \u201cNo baby when did I stop you?\u2019 \u201cOh \u2018O!! \u201c\u201d You want me o get hit and raped, don\u2019t you\u201d\u201d. <\/span><\/p>\n

One girl said to me, \u2018 I called him 113 times and it only when I was at his office did he take my 114 calls. How callous can he be\u201d. Alternately, \u201c My baby is a sexy slut \u2013 look at her butt on the dance floor\u201d. <\/span><\/p>\n

Eh? What?\u00a0<\/span>Or \/And, \u201cBaby don\u2019t let anyone see how sexy you are \u2013 I mean, it makes your gal pals so jealous of you\u201d. <\/span><\/p>\n

You suddenly become the receiver and the cause of the abuse.\u00a0 Call Out this kind of behavior\u2013 Ok, let’s say, the very second time. Time One, we give as a benefit of doubt \u2013 Time Two \u2013 No more! It’s time to go Delete!<\/span><\/p>\n

19. A kid came over<\/h3>\n

Oh my GOD!!\u00a0 And I had to resort to an alcoholic beverage after it left!\u00a0 And before it came over \u2013 I was <\/span>cooking cleaning<\/span>, grating, washing, boiling, double boiling\u2026. When it was here I was running, rushing, gushing, pushing, hushing, and flushing. When it went away, I was cuddling \u2013 not myself or my lover but my little dog who was TRAUMATISED<\/strong> <\/em>by the tiny thing.\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n

And all this when I was well prepared and well informed \u2013 I also know the kid from before, from how <\/span>his<\/span>\u00a0Mom describes it, I was THERE when it came out into the world and\u00a0 \u2013 <\/span>it’s<\/span> NOTHING like It, At all. !!\u00a0 Oh my GOD, once again!! Got me thinking!! All this for just one day \u2013 and I am hitting the bottle. <\/span><\/p>\n

And there is a young couple who are shaking a bottle, 3 times a day \u2013 2 times at night \u2013 for at least 12 MORE months to come. NEWSFLASH!!\u00a0 Babies are no child\u2019s play!! Absolutely and Strictly For Adults ONLY, that proposition.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

So if you are getting any shove, any lip from anyone \u2013 including you are doing it to yourself \u2013 playing up to some deep-seated stereotype \u2013 QUIT IT NOW. Grow up. Get very Adult \u2013 before you get anywhere near getting pregnant \u2013 Both of you!! PLAN!!\u00a0 Your life,\u00a0 your retirement, your money, your house and space ( kids are very mobile and very tough \u2013 this one pushed all my <\/span>grandfather’s<\/span> furniture just laying on the floor) Your finances, your job, Covid, Tsunami, support systems, rituals of your families and their neighbors! <\/span><\/p>\n

Also, plan the next time you will have sex \u2013 ( 24 months ahead \u2013 not because you can\u2019t \u2013 but because you won\u2019t be able ) Make very GOOD friends with your neighbors, keep your house help handy and happy, ensure all the equipment in the house works \u2026did I say finance already?\u00a0 Yup \u2013 needed <\/span>on an every<\/span>day basis.\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n

Turn the page \u2013 more instructions follow \u2013 once you give a tick off on ALL, yes ALL \u2013 then and Only then, search up that Ovulation Calendar \u2013 till then reach out for that Condom, read up on all acts non- penetrative, and keep a Plan B ready \u2013 all the time! That\u2019s such a Contraceptive Technology Pun!! Hope you got it \u2013 NO? Just failed the \u201cReady to get baby Test\u201d, baby! Better luck next time.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

20. Find out if you are in love or not. Clear signs!<\/h3>\n

But how do you know!! How will you tell if it’s just a passing phase or here to stay? You are in luck because I did some search and we found too much information. Apparently, there are signs. Psychological ones Do a checklist and see how many you get as ticks and how many crosses<\/span><\/p>\n

    \n
  1. It feels different from regular love \u2013 or your friend or colleague or cousin. It’s more heady and more euphoric.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/em><\/li>\n
  2. You keep looking at them and in the online space, for them. Any message, any sign, any indication? Took the same quiz as you did, seen the same doodle as you have. YAY!! Not to miss,\u00a0 looking at their photos, till you know each mole and follicle\u2026 just a nice way to start and end your day.\u00a0<\/span><\/em><\/li>\n
  3. You put off your usual activities. Out goes the walk, shift the gym timing, crash the music class…this is much more fun and crucial<\/span><\/em><\/li>\n
  4. Even their wrong seems right. \u201cShe eats Tomato sauce with ice cream \u2013 so TASTY\u201d. \u201cHe wears his undies on this pants \u2013 SO COOL\u201d\u201d<\/span><\/em><\/li>\n
  5. They are all you can think about !! bye, bye productivity!!<\/em><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n
      \n
    1. You want to get something physical with them. Just a touch, a \u2018friendly\u2019 smack, a push back of hair, a brush off an extra crease\u2026who are you kidding!\u00a0<\/span><\/em><\/li>\n
    2. You find them emerging in your other conversations as well, like taking their name often. Sakshi said, Sakshi will say, I am sure Sakshi will\u2026Raj, Geeta, Guru, Feis, Pearl\u2026<\/span><\/em><\/li>\n
    3. You are suddenly very optimistic and hopeful \u2013 for them and for yourself. Mr\/ Ms. Bluesy is now the new Love All!!<\/span><\/em><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

      So where do you fare? I’d say 2 ticks are enough to get you thinking \u2013 This looks like Love!<\/span><\/p>\n

      21. Casual sex is a thing of the past now? Let’s innovate some creative online ways!<\/h3>\n

      Can’t see the person \u2013 they are masked, and not as sexy as old Zorro. They don\u2019t want to touch you, so no shake hands nor physical gestures of affection.\u00a0 Confined at home with a family of all shapes and forms \u2013 so no \u201cyour place or mine\u201d offers either. <\/span><\/p>\n

      Has Corona Killed Casual Sex?\u00a0 So it would seem now.\u00a0 Risk has a new phase and a new face and it’s masked. So what\u2019s it going to be? Sex online?\u00a0 How easy is that, with \u2018periappa\u2019 in the next room and you share with your cousin whose office is closed?\u00a0 What\u2019s going to happen to those one night \/ many night stands? <\/span><\/p>\n

      Those pick up in a bar and then no Baar Baar after? Where will sex with no strings attached go? What will happen to the guy whose only conversation is pick-up lines. Or the girl who is doing the stuff with no added baggage of commitments and lovers. Kahan gaye woh din?<\/em><\/strong> This is the new, \u201c in our time\u201d opener. <\/span><\/p>\n

      \u201cIn our times we could Tinder, Grinder anytime we wanted with anyone we wanted \u2013 all you needed was a condom. \u201c\u201d But that was all BC \u2013 Before Corona. Now it\u2019s PC and nothing polite about that. <\/span><\/p>\n

      Forget PC if things continue this way \u2013 you perhaps are poised on even forgetting how converse. You will need a PC to get talking to anyone hereafter.\u00a0 Which reminds me of the<\/span>\u00a0one race who is having it good is the Stalker \u2013 are they the new Gurus in this game?\u00a0 <\/span><\/p>\n

      Now that everyone is home, bored \u2013 are they playing the field \u2013 so many more to stalk and hassle? I tell you Corona has sounded a Death Knell on much, casual sex is a major casualty.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

      22. Content too complicated to follow and understand.<\/h3>\n

      What\u2019s the most common \u2018drishya<\/strong><\/em>\u2019 that comes to your mind when you think of a sex scenario?.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

      Boy will broach – check the mood, make subtle suggestions, check the general feeling\u2026.<\/span><\/p>\n

      Then, Boy will approach- will you, should we, may I, if you don\u2019t mind \u2026\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

      And all this while, she is smiling, guiding, leading, coyness coupled with \u201ccome hither<\/em>\u201d \u2013 not to lose the opportunity entirely.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

      Then he gets emboldened and begins to intensify the moves and she? She, who was pretty damn keen \u2013 now does a turn around and the clear message of \u201c Am IN<\/strong><\/em>\u201d\u201d suddenly get converted into, \u201c\u201daisee bhi kya jaldi hai<\/em><\/strong>\u201d\u201d ie \u201c\u201d what\u2019s the hurry honey<\/strong>\u201d\u201d, going even as far as. \u201c\u201d you are just into one thing\u201d\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

      Well, Aren\u2019t you Sweetie \u2013 aren\u2019t you, into that One thing \u2013 twice \u2013 if we can? Why the sudden change over? It’s not as if she is saying \u2013 \u2018I changed my mind, I’m taking my YES<\/em> back\u2019.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

      It’s like \u2018I want to \u2013 but not now, soon, later\u2026! Not coz she is being a tease but suddenly she seems to have donned this mantle of the National Guard of Vagina and Vulvas. Vulvas are NOT = Volvos, Einshtein.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

      She becomes the protector and keeper of the Faith of all women\u2019s bodies and abilities to say \u2013 YAY!<\/span><\/p>\n

      It’s almost as if the memo got resent, marked \u2018URGENT- ATTN GIRLS!!\u2019 Watch your V\u2019JayJay! Guard your Poochie \u2013 You are In Charge of NO discharge!\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

      It’s almost as if she has to prove her worth and save her and all womanhood by being the Procrastinator to Pleasure, the Flag Bearer of Bill and Coo.<\/span><\/p>\n

      Women have to make it seem \u2013 she wants it \u2013 but not yet \u2013Time and Tide, Wait for ONE.<\/span><\/p>\n

      That\u2019s an exhausting performance. Ditch it!<\/span><\/p>\n

      \u00a0You aren\u2019t the Gatekeeper of \u2018\u2019Villa In a while, Crocodile.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

      \u00a0In fact, don\u2019t take that job for anything. Money cant by ma Love, baby!!<\/em><\/span><\/p>\n

      23. Are you emotionally feeling sad? Here’s the reason why?<\/h3>\n

      From the best, mind-blowing, awesome Orgasms, you can come down to feeling pretty damn bluesy. You may even identify it as feeling sad. <\/span><\/p>\n

      So what is it? Was the sex bad? Nopes. Is your partner a jerk? Nopes! Are you thinking of what Mommy will say or are the images of your local priest showing up? <\/span><\/p>\n

      Sex was fishy, bad, poor, the worst? Never going to get laid again, Nopes! Then what is it? Why are you sad ?! <\/span><\/p>\n

      Lemme tell ya. Don\u2019t sweat it pal. The thing is \u2013 acts of sex are known to be kinda emotional investments as well \u2013 like lets say even if its casual \u2013 you at least like the person \u2013 a little bit \u2013 even if that \u2013 so see \u2013 that\u2019s an emotion. <\/span><\/p>\n

      Say you don\u2019t \u2013 it\u2019s sympathy sex \u2013 so that\u2019s an emotion. Guilt sex? Eeeemotion! SO. Once you get them emotions, once the act is over \u2013 you could feel \u2013 umm roughly put \u2013 a sort of separation from the persona and the feeling \u2013 so you feel \u2013 sad. <\/span><\/p>\n

      Then, before and during \u2013 oh ho. Dolphins and endorphins \u2013 all doing a dance in your body and mind, you go up to elation and then, zoop \u2013 all fall down. <\/span><\/p>\n

      So does your mood. Like you stretch an elastic band \u2013pull pull pull and when you leave it \u2013 it springs with a tension and in a jiffy just fizzles out. <\/span><\/p>\n

      That\u2019s you. Fizzling from sizzling. Why am I telling you this? Because it’s legit. Don\u2019t worry. Don\u2019t doubt yourself or your partner. <\/span><\/p>\n

      Don\u2019t write them off \u2013 now you know why you got the blues, not because of them or something wrong with you, coz your body and mind are playing tricks. Give it another chance \u2013 always a good idea.<\/span><\/p>\n

      24. Who will decide what’s the ACCEPTED way of dressing up?<\/h3>\n

      Who decides the next outfit you buy? Mummy? Kim Kardashian? Her male equivalent? The X Ray eyes of the Aunties and Uncles of the neighborhood? OR your Bf? <\/span><\/p>\n

      I met a beautiful woman the other day dressed differently from what one usually sees her. Tighter pants than before, compliments piling in that she timidly agreed- looks quite nice no? <\/span><\/p>\n

      Even my son allowed me to go out like this. SON!! Let\u2019s not even get started on the husbands\/wives\/lovers. <\/span><\/p>\n

      You want to wear anything, go do it. No issue at all. Anyone apart from your parents trying to tear you down for looking, too fat, too thin, too sexy, too dull, too appealing, too \u2026.whatever, is just too much. <\/span><\/p>\n

      It\u2019s a very clever way of breaking you down, shakin\u2019 your confidence \u2013 don\u2019t let it happen. Now how come we don\u2019t hear this sort of a thing with Gentlemen \u2013 or am I mistaken.<\/span><\/p>\n

      25. When you have something to say or share, is your partner available or interested?<\/h3>\n

      Has this thought gone across your mind ever so often? So many times before \u2013 and well \u2013 just stayed there \u2013 in your head? Have you wanted to say it out, but well, didn\u2019t because you know why? No one is really listening \u2013 are they? <\/span><\/p>\n

      No one is really saying \u2013 Ya ya \u2013 sure please tell me what you got on your mind. Nope, that’s not happening! If that be the case \u2013 a bit too often \u2013 you have some consideration to do. The partner who is present but not there, the saathi who is more of a haathi \u2013 lost in their own world \u2013 not bothered to know what\u2019s going on with you is not the person you want to spend your long time with. <\/span><\/p>\n

      Comes back to the good ole C-word \u2013 no, not Covid \u2013 Communication.\u00a0 Perhaps more than that. I\u2019d put a lot of power behind a partner who is keen to hear your opinion, your thoughts, and ideas and is keen to ask you about how you feel today, about any of your favorite pet projects, about an issue you are passionate about \u2013 be it global warming or stray animals. That the next time you simply utter, I have something to say, they are all ears and all heart with their face and eyes.<\/span><\/p>\n

      26. Never lose yourself when trying to fit in someone else’s life.<\/h3>\n

      Before a day dawns and you are wondering who that person is in the mirror. Relations and lovers are very tricky. They begin with \u2018just love everything about you, you are so cool<\/em>.\u2019 And soon enough opinions begin to emerge.<\/span><\/p>\n

      And soon they become so many and so frequent. It\u2019s almost like you become someone who you never were. I tell you what \u2013 it’s going to come and bite you in your butt, sooner or later. <\/span><\/p>\n

      Not saying don\u2019t adjust with the partner, sure, but I am also saying don\u2019t go so much of the extra mile that you stopped walking a while ago. A guy walks into a room, wearing a particular kind of shirt, say local hand block cotton. <\/span><\/p>\n

      Big departure from the solids and stripes he\u2019s worn all his life. She gives me so many of these. It really helps the artisan. <\/span><\/p>\n

      Okkkkk!! From \u201dI hate makeup<\/em>\u201d\u201d, to \u201cGirls must enhance\u201d. Oh ho \u2013 when did that happen? And this and many of these apart \u2013 I’ve seen people either switch over or then just clam up \u2013 coz it doesn\u2019t go so well with the partner. <\/span><\/p>\n

      I tell you what. One day you will get up to realize, it doesn\u2019t sit so well with you either. So ya, no harm in making some small adjustments, as long as it\u2019s a two-way street and it\u2019s not asking away from you what you like about yourself.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

      27. Too many opinions can be harmful to you!<\/h3>\n

      Frankly, opinions are welcome. However, if they are coming on and on about almost everything about you and yours, from your job to your boss to your family and your dog and the food you\u2019ve cooked for yourself, and the tie or tights you wear and how close you stand to your colleagues to how that black stuff you put in your eyes is not working for you, and all the more, are very soon, not going to be working either,\u00a0 for you both. <\/span><\/p>\n

      So set boundaries. Discuss on what matters you are ready for inputs and on what not. Often this is just a vent-out session so listen carefully. That\u2019s all \u2013 Listen.\u00a0 Give the \u201cinput\u201d fairly and sparingly \u2013 unless asked for. <\/span><\/p>\n

      Believe me \u2013will take you long and far!! You have convictions, ideas, and opinions, voice them but also be open to hearing diverse views in the room. Some of them can be equally passionate to you. <\/span><\/p>\n

      28. Bygones Better Gone<\/h3>\n

      There are two things which are a real waste of time, energy, and emotion. One. Holding on to something that just went past. Two. A word said out of turn, a comment which came out wrong, an opinion which sounded like an insult. <\/span><\/p>\n

      So what. I\u2019d say, in the words of one of the greatest artists of all times \u201cLet it be\u201d. Why you may ask, For Love I say. Just that. Do it for love, not just one time \u2013 a few good times \u2013 make that effort. <\/span><\/p>\n

      Make quite a few efforts. And then you, Waste No 2.\u00a0 You F*&^ it up, Big time\u00a0 – and you know it. Own it. You are allowed to make mistakes too, you know. <\/span><\/p>\n

      Apologize, make amends, not once \u2013 many times \u2013 for the same reason \u2013 Love. Kick your own butt, again many times but then \u2013 that\u2019s it. It\u2019s done, it’s dusted, it’s Over. You\u2019ve learnt something about yourself \u2013 that you can be a jerk of sorts \u2013 forgive it \u2013 don\u2019t forget it.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

      Hopefully, your partner will show the same magnanimity \u2013 the Let it be. Something is just better buried and left behind. <\/span><\/p>\n

      But ya, now don\u2019t go being too smart and do something heinous and come back with a \u201c\u201d I made a mistake\u201d\u201d- no one\u2019s fool enough to let you get away with that.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

      29. Social misfits or trying too hard to be different to fit in?<\/h3>\n

      Everyone wants to be different and yet many of us don\u2019t really like to stand out or be the center of attention. Both are good as long as you both know what you are in for. <\/span><\/p>\n

      The trouble is the one who wants to be different \u2013 a little too desperately or trying too hard to be different!! Now I love a couple who are poles apart as long as they are in it together, he is a dainty dithering daisy, she a blazing siren and they are so good together \u2013 a perfect score. <\/span><\/p>\n

      But here comes the other. The partner who is so into themselves that they forget that they may be making you and others uncomfortable. <\/span><\/p>\n

      The partner who is so into \u2018I am so cool\u2019 that they forget that they are looking like the village fool and making you look like one too. Tell me, how many times have you been in a situation where a pal has asked you about your \u201dpartner\u201d\u201d \u2013 \u201c\u201dAre you sure\u201d\u201d? \u201c\u201d <\/span><\/p>\n

      You can do better\u201d\u201d\u2026 and when things go south \u2013 a pal will say \u201c\u201d have you lost your mind\u201d\u201d. You feel upset \u2013 you stick up for the partner who you have chased and courted over the App and now this? <\/span><\/p>\n

      Hell’s Kitchen. But Time to brave up. Let me sum it up \u2013 a person who has no regard for your dignity in public \u2013 who has no sensitivity towards what you or your friends and family may be feeling \u2013 is not worthy to partner with. Better apart than apart. Done.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

      30. Is loneliness the right reason for getting married?<\/h3>\n

      I am so lonely, I have no one to love, no one loves me, I’m the only one not hitched or married, I have no one to go to movies with, when will I wear my sexy first night nighty\u2026 Oh GOD\u2026 when will you shut up! <\/span><\/p>\n

      Yes? You all feel me, No? YES, you do. And this is exactly the reason why you don\u2019t want to be with this sort of person or be this sort of a person. I tell you being lonely is really no good reason to get married. <\/span><\/p>\n

      A relationship needs people who come into it with full gusto, with readiness and gusto, and not because they are looking for a \u201cGet out of Jail free\u201d card. <\/span><\/p>\n

      Getting married \u2018coz you’re lonely is like moving from the sofa to the couch. It\u2019s not the role of the partner (the not so lonely) to entertain you out of your loneliness, to keep you cheerful and in a good mood, to repair your sad situation. <\/span><\/p>\n

      That\u2019s a LOT of expectations from a relationship. You marry or get together because you like each other, love the company, the person makes you feel good about yourself, etc. <\/span><\/p>\n

      Marriage, courting, app dating \u2013 Oh my God \u2013 you need all your wits about you \u2013 so shake off those blues and get ready to jazz it up, otherwise, this is not your game, baby.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

      31. The initial signs of cheating to pay close heed to!<\/h3>\n

      Ok first Look, people, this is a dating app and not a deal made at the Notary in the High Court of Love.<\/strong><\/em> This is the place where less is limiting and more is scoring. Initially \u2013 it\u2019s like a bit of a buffet. <\/span><\/p>\n

      You keep some and you don\u2019t keep many. You do a \u201csmart selection<\/em>\u201d and then you \u201ctaste the samples<\/em>.\u201d Some you push off your plate on the first bite and the selected few you go back for seconds for and again, you choose what worked for you and finally you end your meal with what you liked best. <\/span><\/p>\n

      The one \u201cdishy<\/strong>\u2019\u2019 serving. Meal and deal over. But you also want to know, did you end up on the second selection or have you been pushed off the plate \u2013 hell yes. After all, you are doing the same. <\/span><\/p>\n

      So suddenly they don\u2019t have time to chat as much \u2013 only because they joined the Gym. <\/span><\/p>\n

      Suddenly, a new wardrobe has appeared, suddenly the language\/lexicon you shared is very different, suddenly your \u201c\u201d faults\u201d\u201d are becoming too discussed and suddenly the sex talk has taken a toss and suddenly you are becoming too demanding\/questioning!\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

      32. In the journey of finding love, is ignoring your friends acceptable?<\/h3>\n

      The first to get kicked off the board when the stranger in the App becomes so perfect are friends. No time for buddies. You start dating\/ looking to keep them very close. They know you, they have seen you, they may not be your best but they are right there- flesh and bone. <\/span><\/p>\n

      The newbie is still a newbie. Take advice. Ask for it. Think about it and even \u201ctest out what they have to say. We all know that Love can be very liberating and can make a fool out of a philosopher because we just don\u2019t want anything or anyone to bust the beautiful bubble we are immersing ourselves in. <\/span><\/p>\n

      You miss seeing the signs, the red flags. You miss the small nuances, the small demands, the tiny jibes. But you know who doesn\u2019t \u2013 Your PAL. And you know who gets the most flak \u2013 Your PAL. <\/span><\/p>\n

      You never have enough time, you always talk about the \u201dpotential\u201d, you are always asking them to make up your mind for you but not doing what they suggest, you\u2019ve forgotten your own times together and everything is about you and your other. <\/span><\/p>\n

      For one, you are dull company now and for two, you are losing out \u2013 on your Dosti, Na\u1e6dpu, Bandhutba, Mitrat\u0101, Zuva!! In this dating thing, you will need a few people who will keep it real and objective for you \u2013 Pals and Friends. <\/span><\/p>\n

      And if things go sour \u2013 who’s going to be the person you hit the bottle with? And if things go great, who’s going to be the person you hit the bottle with?\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

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